August 15, 2006
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A Sense of Direction
Believe it or not, I have been blessed with a perfect sense of
direction. If I can't find a place, it's not my
fault. It's because it's not where it's supposed to be...or
MapQuest has messed up again.The latter occurred on my way to a rare morning C.E. event in
Effingham. Heading north on I-57, I followed MapQuest's
instructions to take exit 160. I soon discovered that all
subsequent directions were completely wrong. The street names
didn't match up at all. Those incompetent MapQuest fools!
This wasn't the first time I had received bogus directions from
them. It was only by virtue of my aforementioned perfect sense of
direction that I arrived in time for the lecture.I knew that the restaurant catering our post-lecture meal would be
the site of another C.E. meeting in the near future, so afterwards I set out to find
it. After a casual tour of many picturesque areas, my keen
navigational skills enabled me to locate the building (well north of the
ophthalmology practice where today's C.E. was held). Imagine my
surprise when, heading north, I went past another,
completely different interstate exit 160! Funny that there
should be two...when I had exited at 160 further south, there had been
no indications of a 160A or 160B. To cap it all off, on the way
back home I observed that my original exit 160 (where I exited on the
way there) had been switched to 159!This can only mean ONE THING: The MapQuest folks are going about
and maliciously, capriciously changing exit number signs! They
apparently take a perverse pleasure in disorienting innocent
people. Well, this time
they've bitten off more than they can chew. It's time someone
took a stand against those MapQuest miscreants! For me it was
just a minor annoyance, but to those lacking my perfect sense of
direction, the consequences could be much more serious. Who knows
how many others have been led astray by their vile, MapQuest-y
ways? I am calling for an independent congressional investigation
into MapQuest and its corrupt administration, as should any thinking
citizen. Who among you will join me?
Comments (1)
This was actually posted at about 4:00 P.M. if I remember right. Not sure how it came up with 9:01 A.M.
Amazingly, when I went in to get my photo taken for our church directory this very evening, the lady who helped me select the photos complained about MapQuest(without any prompting whatsoever). Needless to say, it must be a sign!
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